Dear Gmail

Dear once-heralded Interwebz email provider,

     I want to love you, I really do.  But goddamn it Gmail, when you tell me I can successfully link my various academic email accounts with no problems you really oughta deliver.  At first, like most torrid affairs, you fetched me my documents like a doting lovebird.  Where did we go wrong?  Apparently, you have NOT been fetching various important emails, e.g. security reminders, credit notifications, and family how-are-ya's.  Of course, you have brought me some: spam and useless club reminders.  (I'm very far away, Gmail; I don't need to know when the snowboard club is having its next meeting.)  But fetching nothing would have been far too obvious, and that's what this all really boils down to, right Gmail?  Lies and cowardly deceit!  Well I won't let you hurt me anymore!  You get one more chance (cus I still like your useful, attractive interface), but any more screw-ups and I'm done.  Thanks.

                   Love,
                           Labour's Lost    (get it?  god, I'm clever :]  )