Dear Sonnets

Dear Sonnets,

You suck. Shakespeare had you wrapped around his little finger, but ever since then you've been annoying. Why did you make it take me over an hour to write one of you? All I wanted was to sleep, but noooooo, you had to go and be all prissy and difficult. Die in a fire.

Love Hate,
-Jackie

P.S. Dear Shakespeare, your sonnets are lovely and fun and great. Come back to life and teach me, please.

Dear IT Department

Dear Goldsmiths IT Department,

     Please note that some of us do not appreciate being randomly disconnected from the internet.  XpressConnect (you know who you are!) may indeed be fast, but if someone were to multiply (fast) X (a shit ton # of times), he or she might be UNpleasantly surprised to find that they'll arrive at a large, unwieldy number.  Because I do not have to *enter my credentials* when I plug my charger, for example, into the wall outlet, I hereby propose that ethernet cable + ethernet port = internetz.  Please note the previous theorem, and have a nice day.

               Love,
                    Adam and angry techies everywhere

Dear Goldsmith's Maintenance

Dear Goldsmith's Maintenance people.
I would really appreciate hot water for showers, if its not too much to ask...oh wait it is.
Taking showers in a friends room for the rest of the term is just not gnna fucking cut it. k thanks.

--Komal

Dear Tunbridge Wells

Dear Tunbridge Wells,

Heat is nice. Especially in winter. Just sayin'.

Love, Hayley

Dear SEPTA

Dear SEPTA (and pretty much every other form of US public transit I've ridden),

     You should learn to be more like the Tube. Even the overground. They're quick, they're efficient, and when shit goes down they actually APOLOGIZE for the unforeseen circumstances that have made your day less than perfect. Oh, yeah. AND THEY'RE CLEAN.

Love,
--Jackie

P.S. Dear London,
     Public Transit: you're doin' it right.

Dear Homestay

Dear Homestay,
You can go fuck yourself, becuase we all hated you, and wished you didn't exist.


--Love Komal, and probably everyone else.